Since Before I Can Remember

“Man’s best friend,” the most cliché, stereotypical descriptor of what dogs mean to their owners. They can be service dogs, guide dogs, therapy dogs, watch dogs, hunting dogs, herding dogs, rescue dogs, tracking dogs, detection dogs, police dogs, or sled dogs. Each breed was intended for specific roles in society. Dogs have unique abilities and personalities just like any person, and they have had an unexpected, life-altering, irreplaceable presence in my life…

since before I can remember

I have loved dogs my entire life, and I couldn’t possibly remember the names of every single one that has impacted me. But these are the ones I could never forget: Darla and Barney, Angel and Buddy, Duke and Duchess, Sadie and Copper, Leah and Justice, Elsie and Jedi, Buster and Remi, Merlot and Maggie, Bear and Moose, and Dolly and Opal. Most of these dogs aren’t even my family’s but are dogs that I have connected to in different and unique ways. Each of these dogs and more have been teaching me something about life as it is or as it will be… 

since before I can remember

It has been difficult for me to abandon any animals to fend for themselves. So when I got my own car and started driving myself, I started picking up dogs on the side of the road. I struggle to remember any of their names or how many dogs I actually picked up, but there is something deep in me that makes me stop almost every time. 

I believe the first one was wandering around near my house, a little too close to the road for my caring nature to overlook. I might have coaxed the dog until I could pick him up, and I carried him to the nearest house. I knocked on the door, and someone responded and said they didn’t know the dog. So I put him in the car and took him to my house. Now that I think about it, I don’t think I was driving. I don’t think I even had my license. Maybe my older brother was driving, yeah, I think we both stopped to help the dog. Anyway, we took it to our house and his owner saw him from the road when my sister was playing with him in our front yard. Ironically, the owner lived in the house across the street from the one we checked.

There were other dogs on my street that I picked up and returned to their owners, and there were even more that I found further away from my house. This one was walking back and forth across a busy road, so my younger brother and I stopped and got him in the car with us. We drove to the Ingles down the road and tried to let him out because he didn’t have a collar. We thought he was a stray and didn’t want to get bit. But he kept following us, and we were worried that he would go back to road and get hit by a car. So we took him to our house, and my dad posted a picture of him on Facebook. 

We had him for a few days before my dad found the owner. He was all the way from Gaffney, which I think is about an hour or so away from where we found his dog. We learned he had jumped out of the open window of his owner’s car. I honestly cannot remember where exactly his owner was when the dog jumped out, but it was a long way from where we found him. My family joked that the dog looked like the stray Miguel befriended in Disney’s Coco. I think we nicknamed him Rico or something like that. 

Dogs like Rico have always found me one way or another. Maybe I just know to look out for stray or lost dogs because the dogs in my life have looked out for me… 

since before I can remember

I have shared many hilarious, child-like, sweet, indelible memories with many dogs: running after them across the road so they don’t get hit by a car, squeezing them so tight I forget what I am sad about, rubbing their bellies until my hand gets tired, talking to them for hours about anything and everything, wiping their sneaky, slobbery kisses off my face, carrying them back to the house after they ran away for the hundredth time, barking back at them when they say hi each time I see them, sharing my dinner with them without anyone else noticing, moping around when my parents wouldn’t let me pet them when I had Covid, changing after they got mud or dirt all over my clothes, cleaning their pee stains out of every single carpet in our house, and caring for these dogs… 

since before I can remember

Dogs have been my dearest friends. They have such a comforting and empathetic nature that I don’t often receive from the people in my life. Dogs are beautiful blessings and gifts from the Father that give us a glimpse of His love for us. 

He gave me Dolly and Opal to show me what fierce and passionate love looks like. These sisters adored, threatened, nurtured, fought, and respected each other, just like how my siblings and I did. They loved me by simply listening, sitting, comforting, and reassuring me in their own unspoken, intuitive, unconscious, devoted, affectionate way. They became my roommates, accomplices, care takers, allies, confidants, and soul mates… 

since before I can remember

Two particular dogs have been there for me and have had my heart. When my two adorable, rambunctious, headstrong, protective, loving, steadfast, curious, sweet beagles Dolly and Opal ran off and never came back, something in me broke. I can’t see a dead animal on the side of the road without seeing their precious faces. I can’t watch a movie about a dog dying in sudden circumstances without remembering their kind eyes. I can’t feel the comfort of a dog without thinking of their beautiful spirits. I can’t look back at all the memories without mourning their presence. But maybe one day, there will be another dog that can fill the hole in my heart, because dogs will always be a part of me, like they have been…

since before I can remember.